Married Gay Men.

Oh yes. We’ve all heard a lot about them. Every second article in the international press about homosexuality in India, even ones talking about the repeal-ment of 377 talk about millions of gay men being trapped in marriages in India. And believe it or not, I am dead against sleeping with married men too. And just for that I had limited the age barrier for my tricks to be at most 26. Ok, ok, 28 if the guy appeared well-spoken and produced a good pic (which would turn out to be a picture taken 10 years ago in most cases). I also would not fuck anyone younger than me – I was mostly scared I would end up with a 16-17 year old and then I would REALLY by doing something wrong.

So there’s this time I was meeting this guy in a hotel room for a sleazy encounter – in good ol’ Jaipur. And I had spoken to him a couple of times over the phone - which is twice as much as I had spoken to most guys over the phone before I met them – and then I met him at McDonald’s near Raj Mandir. And even though he looked much older (and a lot, ahem, different) from the photo he had passed on to me over the internet, I had this severe case of blue balls and followed him. He said he was 28 – that was probably true.

So then I went to his room and things started getting a little hot and steamy and we started making out and my shirt slipped off and he started sucking my nipples (God, I love that!) and I threw my head back and sighed. And then a thought intruded my ecstasy. “Dude, are you married?” I suddenly asked.

He paused the flicking off his tongue (and I missed it immediately) and responded immediately. “Of course not!”

A smile replaced my worry and I tilted my head back again as his talented tongue went back to what it did best. “I am engaged though.”

I gulped. And then I slinked away, much to his surprise. I scooted over and quickly stared getting back into my clothes. “I’m sorry!” I said, “I can’t do this!”

He looked annoyed. “You’re leaving coz I’m engaged?” he asked angrily. And when I didn’t reply he asked in a softer tone. “I shouldn’t have revealed that right? Then we would be fucking in ignorance right now.”

I left, slamming the door. Back near Raj Mandir I hastily caught an auto and headed back. And then I felt a little bad about my sudden exit. I texted him – “SORRY 4 LEAVING LIKE THAT. HOPE U UNDERSTAND”

He texted back – “I UNDERSTAND COMPLETELY. SO YOU’LL COME BACK FOR SEX?”

Boy, was I peeved!

So my straight friends, who have an ancanny interest in hearing all about my tricks found out later and I later had an argument with a friend of mine who actually supported my soon-to-be-married trick.

“It’s not his fault Saumi!” my friend wailed, “You were his only outlet.”
“That doesn’t mean I have to do things for him!” I shouted back. “If he wants an outlet so badly he can go buy one!”

So what is with Indian gay guys and marriages? I knew tonnes of people in Jaipur in their 30’s and 40’s and even older, who would sneak out to fuck around with a guy. I know – we’re in a background where the majority of the population still doesn’t even UNDERSTAND the word gay, but still – lying and living a double life like that? Hmmm. Maybe I don’t understand the situation well enough, but lying and deceiving and infidelity like that – not my cup of tea. (I know this statement is gonna bite me in the ass later – remember the whole hypocrisy thing?)

Kinda brings me back to the discussion I had with my parents (or lack thereof) When I came out (or rather was found out in a rather embarrassing situation), I made one thing clear – that whatever happened, I was not getting married and ruining some poor girl’s life – and this too when I was 16 – boy, was I wise when I was younger!

Anyways – saw a bunch of movies on the same topic (though not with an Indian context) – always end in tragedy. You can check out Segunda Piel (spanish), Le Fate Ignoranti (spanish as well) few others I can't recall...

As for my own blue-ball crises at that time, I guess I solved it the next day with some unmarried non-committed guy the next day – or maybe with my own right hand.